This week Keego indulges in some 50-Shades-style sado-masochism, remembering a fruitless double quest down the N7.
It is kind of getting to be that fling that is going on too long isn’t it?
This blog is the rugby version of 50 shades of grey…..
It can be filthy, slightly erotic, ingenious and titillating….
I thought following on from last week I would reminisce about the time I ventured to the outer realms of civilization, a place where evolution isn’t always present, a place where you don’t always understand what the locals are saying….
I went to Limerick!
Thomond Park to be exact.
It was the Grand Final of the Magners League.
To get to Thomond Park, we have to visit the week before. The H-bomb final. I was in the lucky pub (the Queens in Dalkey) with the aul fella and a few other heads. They had 3 beers for €10 which resulted in a fairly hairy morning after but I do remember the game vividly. I remember the feeling of dread at half time.
22-6 down to a rampaging Northampton. The most unlikeable team in European sport. Captain Cullen says in his book that he wasn’t looking forward to the sight of that twat Dylan Hartley holding up the cup. The word twat was added for emphasis (higher level English in affect here)
We know what happened, we all have the DVD. Sexto gave a Maximus Decimus Meridius-esque half time speech and the boys turned it around. The lads scored 27 unanswered points and won 33-22.
We were higher than Snoop Dogg in a grow shop.
It was Munster next. I thought we would be ok, and have the first double in Leinster history. The journey to Limerick took a long time. One way streets and driving to 1985 took some time. We got there and walked up to the stadium. In fairness , the stadium looks great. The banter was great all the way through. They had spread the Leinster fans around the pitch, so we were not all together. Which meant I had to shout louder, which got me a yellow card from the wife.
Munster looked really up for this game, and from the kick off we looked tired. The blue army where doing their best to g up the lads. We out did the Munster fans for most of the game, I think up until the last 10 minutes or so we had their number. But we tired just as fast as the team did.
Even though the lads looked tired, we got close to the line on a few occasions. A champion’s performance was possible. We could have had 4 tries, which would have obviously changed the game. I think if we could have delivered 1 try from the 4 attempts it would have helped the energy levels, but the Munster defence held firm for the first time all season.
Also, Marcus Horan shouldered Drico which lead to the neck operation he had to have recently. Damn you Marcus Horan. One day I will ring you from a blocked number to shout abuse at you! Or maybe not...
Anyway, it was 7-3 at half time and it was time to test Thomond Park where it counts. In the bar! You need to partake in a Guinness at a rugby match. It is the law. It was on the 3rd page of the 10 commandments which has since been lost.
I asked for a Guinness, a conversation that I was not fully able to contribute due to language barrier ensued. A good Guinness resulted though, so it wasn’t a wasted journey.
The second half kicked off, the roars where huge. Almost immediately we were back on the Munster line trying to score. Some cheeky (and illegal) play from that spoon Donncha O’Callaghan earned him a yellow, but stopped a near certain try. Sexto took the 3 points instead. Again leaving some points behind. We finally took the lead at 60 minutes with another Sexto penalty. We really need to get that right boot cloned. One of you must get a lock of his hair, I know scientists that can build the clone.
Then Munster put the foot down and the thumping try saving tackle came from my arch nemesis Luke Fitzgerald. I could hear the contact from the stands, everyone made that strange sound you make when someone nearly scores (not the noise you make when YOU nearly score but fail ;))
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Good man Luke! Putting the shoulder in is what we want! That tackle knocked Munster back a wee bit but O’Gara kicked cross field to Earls who avoided multiple tackles and scored. This was where we looked really tired. The misery was finished off when Nigel Owens gave them a penalty try, converted by O’Gara.
Again we had opportunities to score. Watching the game again, we could have scored 8 tries. We just didn’t have the energy to finish them off. Final score was 19-9.
After that the banter was still great. I think when you see an animal in its natural habitat it is easier to communicate with them ;). The rest of the night was great. One of the greatest actually. We went to Clohessys and had a few pints with some Munster players. The highlight was meeting and chatting to Tony “Mushy” Buckley. The biggest man I have ever met, but he has the face of a 12 year old…..don’t tell him I said that!
If anyone wants to get a crew to Thomond Park for the away game in the upcoming season, count me all the way in. I need my revenge ;)
In closing, if any Munster fans read this, I am only taking the piss. Limerick was great fun and would gladly go back there to shout at you all. In fact, I challenge you to come to Lansdowne road and take us on; we will take you on down there down there…
The season is getting closer. The excitement is building quicker than the sale of nipple clamps for women after reading 50 shades of jaysus grey.
Until next week, if there is a next week...
Keego (@nkeegan): Newbie blogger, former professional wrestler, sometime attempted rugby player (@TheThirsty3rds), professional procrastinator and attempted musician with a fondness for long walks on the bar, tea and the couch. Opinionated Leinster fan and constant gardener.
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